"... I will never leave you nor forsake you." (Hebrews 13:5 TPT)
Far before the current COVID- 19 pandemic, was a pandemic of loneliness.
Loneliness is a concept, I'm sure, many are acquainted with- longing to feel connected to others, longing to be held and seen and known. Often coupled with or expressed through hopelessness and lack of energy, loneliness affects everyone at some point. It can occur when we are alone, or surrounded by people.
I'm no stranger to loneliness, in fact, it is quite the opposite. For most of my life, shame and lies dictated how I lived. Believing I was not worth being heard or seen, I often hid my true feelings in an attempt to be perfect and blend in. While it worked for me to blend in and stay seemingly strong, I was falling apart inside. Never really letting anyone into my life, I remained hidden in a facade and continued to grow more lonely.
Rock bottom came when I received a diagnosis of depression and anxiety that I despised. No longer was I perfect or strong, but I was broken and weary. The season of my life following this diagnosis was the most lonely time I have ever experienced. Lies flooded my mind daily, negative thoughts and harmful behaviour kept me trapped in a prison of shame. I was not who I aspired to be and I could not bear the thought of people knowing the real me. I was hopeless and alone, even while being surrounded by people. It was in my most desperate times, that I discovered true love. Though I did not understand why God would bring me to such a lonely place, I found him and He never left. I realized he didn't cause my loneliness, but he could use it to show me who he really is- comforter, constant companion, friend.
In moments of utter hopelessness and feeling like I was completely alone, all I had to do was whisper "Jesus" and he showed up- again and again. He brought me people (friends, nursing instructors, mentors, etc.) through my journey to help me see what he was already saying about me. Though it took years of medication, therapy and eventually a year at Ministry School, I have found freedom from loneliness and want nothing more than to share my freedom story.
I know that my story of loneliness is not the only one. Even in the Bible, it shows people like David in Psalms 25:16 saying " turn to me and be gracious to me, I am lonely and afflicted" (ESV). David- a man after God's own heart, also experienced loneliness. I don't know about you, but that's reassuring to me. The second thing that reassures me about this is that He doesn't remain lonely. In Psalms 23:4 (TPT), David gives us a beautiful picture of the reality of who God is. It says "Lord, even when your path takes me through the valley of deepest darkness, fear will never conquer me, for you already have! You remain close to me and lead me through it all the way. Your authority is my strength and my peace. The comfort of your love takes away my fear. I'll never be lonely, for you are near."
The following are some practical tips my sisters and I have used to combat loneliness and live in truth:
STAY HEALTHY
Eating healthy, exercising regularly and getting adequate sleep is essential to mental wellness, and therefore keeps you in a positive mindset, leaving no room for loneliness to creep in.
REACH OUT
Even though it can be super scary, reaching out to trusted friends and finding a good community is essential to abolishing loneliness.
Invite God into your process
RENEW YOUR MIND
Be Thankful- writer down at least 5 things you are thankful for every day!
Read Scripture- read, declare and remind yourself of passages of the Bible that remind you of who God says you are and that He never leaves you (Psalm 23, Deutoronomy 31:6, Romans 8:38-39, Psalm 27:5).
Music- listen to and participate in worship (Hillsong, Bethel Music, Elevation Worship, etc.)
He sees me. He sees you. Even when we wish he didn't, He sees us and he still chooses to love us, completely. There is nothing that would make Him leave us. A point I'd like you to consider is this, loneliness is a feeling, however, our feelings are not always an accurate depiction of truth. I understand that feeling lonely is valid- I've been there, however, when we search out what the truth says, we are told that we are NEVER ALONE. I pray that you will discover light and hope on this journey of freedom from loneliness.
Even if you do not consider yourself a Christian, God's promises are for you, and he would love to have a relationship with you. If you are searching and have questions about God, please reach out and ask, we would love to answer them and love you through your process.
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